We are normal.!?

 So today I will be sharing my recent observations of several goings-on in the house.  Now let me explain, I DO see that these things are going on.  I may not take a step back and realize WHAT exactly it was until like, the Tuesday after it happened a few minutes later, but, well, I have a lot going on. 

**Disclaimer-No child/parent/cookie was injured in the writing/observing for this blog. **

• Daughter hates clothing.  HATES.  It is like as soon as we walk in the door at night after daycare, she comes in, and PANTS, SOCKS, SHOES OFF.  Shirt is optional.  She is, however, VERY interested in everyone’s belly button.  Or “Butt?” as she calls it when she is digging her finger so far inside MY belly button that she may have punctured something in there.  I have decided that she will be very good in the Science/Anatomy field. 

• Son is an instigator.  He thinks I don’t pay attention, but I do.  I watch him take Daughter’s food, toys, blanket, chair, whatever she is interested in at the moment.  He KNOWS she will scream.  He KNOWS she will cry fake tears.  He KNOWS she will call for me.  Oh the fun he has.  I tell him No.  He does it again 2 seconds later.  Truth???  I think his sister likes it.  She likes the ‘game’.  At least that’s why I tell myself.  My sister LOVED when we did that!  Right??  Yeah, I’m sure she loved it.

• Son sneaks food from his sister.  THE SAME WAY I SNEAK FOOD FROM HIM!!!!!  He comes in the living room and his cheeks are puffed out and cookie crumbs are spewing from his mouth.  “What are you eating?”  “MNUFNGINDFG”.  Oh really?  Can you whistle?  “I ASDHKFDON’T ASDGHJHOW” (Cookie mouth translation – I don’t know how.)  She knows he has a cookie in there.  Just like he knows when I have 2 brownies in there.  We all do it…..soon I will have to find a better way to sneak…like lock myself in the car.

• Daughter is already a ‘shoe-a-holic’.  She will take any and all shoes out of the closet, put them on, and strut her stuff like she is walkin’ the runway.  (All with no clothes on).  My boyfriend’s sneakers are her favorite.  They have bright yellow laces that she likes to have laced up her leg….she will grab a purse, head to the door and say “Bye, Bye!” 

So, to sum up, we have a good time.  Clothing optional, apparently, but whatever.  Are we normal?  Well, we are for us.  I mean, who has Toaster Strudel, Cheese, Graham Crackers, Oyster Crackers, Fruity Pebbles and Grape Juice for their dinner spread?  That’s right, WE DO!  Yep.  They let me be a mom.

Love & Stuff

Cabin Fever

Alright, it is a new year, and I am going to try and blog once a week.  That is my goal.  It has been a while, obviously, so suck it up, and let's get back to it.

Ahhh….a BRAND new year.  After this crazy holiday break, I have NEVER been happier in my life to return to work as I was this morning.  Daughter was so happy that she was getting out of the house; she put her shoes by the door and just stared at me with longing eyes, that look that says “I need you the hell away from me….NOW”.  I had been giving her the same look for at least 4 days.  The cabin fever had officially sunk in.

Now, to give you some background, it is not like we didn’t leave the house for our whole vacation, I did work a few days, but there was no school for son, and daughter did go to daycare, but everyone’s routines were off.  For some reason, neither child wanted to wear clothing for 2-3 days.  AT THE END OF DECEMBER.  I, on the other hand, had on 4 different layers trying to keep warm, and these 2 fools think we are on MTV’s Spring Break (do they even have that anymore)?  So, when they actually put on some clothes, we went to the usual places.  You know, Target and the grocery store.  Son of course had Christmas money burning a hole in his pocket, and we spent 2 hours at Target while he mentally calculated every last cent in his head.  FINALLY he makes a decision, and of course, with tax, it was over the amount that he had to spend.  He tells the cashier “I only have X dollars.  My mom will pay the rest”.  Yep, mom’s job is just to dispense the money.  You just got 8 bazillion gifts from Santa and your family, but, “hey, mom, chip in for more stuff I don’t need, OK”?  OR even better “hey, mom, chip in for more stuff I will play with for about a week, OR until my sister breaks it.”  Whatever.

Also, out of sheer boredom and lack of clothing (maybe I really should do some laundry, maybe THAT is the reason my kids are running around in nothing, note to check that later), and since there is “NOTHING TO DO AT THE HOUSE, IT’S SO BORING”, son decided that Tuesday was now known as “Toot sound Tuesday”.  Alrighty.  It was funny for about 5 minutes.  One of us bent over “TOOOT”,  Daughter learned how to make the “wet fart” sound with her lips, and so on, and so on.  Since I do have the maturity of a 14 year old boy, yes, I did giggle.  But it got old…….quickly.  I can’t wait for “Fart Sound Friday”.  Yes, that also will be an actual day this week.  Thank goodness it will only last for a few hours until bedtime……….ALSO, good thing son doesn’t know what a ‘Shart’ is yet, or it would be a LOOOOONG weekend, if you get my drift.

I hope you all had a memorable holiday.  Not really, I was just trying to be nice.  Most of us have holidays that we wish we could just drink away, right?  No?  It’s just me?  I need to work on that then………………………………………

Love & Stuff